A few weeks ago I was teaching at a fabulous church in Los Angeles. Lo and behold, I had the privilege of meeting a woman that I’ve only admired from afar. Her name is Candace Bure. She was the spunky daughter on a show that kept me riveted for years – Full House.
It was so glad to see how. . .well. . normal she was. A sister in Christ, mother of three small children, wife and a woman trying to juggle all of the same balls we all are. So, I thought you’d enjoy getting to know this incredible woman whose love for the Lord is shining through in every way.
Thanks for sharing yourself with us today Candace. You’re FULL LIFE is an encouragement to us all.
1. Candace, tell us about your family. a.) Your husband: How did you meet?
Val and I were introduced at a celebrity/charity hockey game in Los Angeles by my co-star on Full House, Dave Coulier. Just 3 years earlier, Val and his brother had moved to the United States from Moscow, Russia because they were drafted by the NHL. Not speaking English all that well, they watched Full House to help! Fast forward to the charity game – Dave invited the whole cast to watch him play, but figured he’d introduce me to 2 rising hockey stars since we were close in age. Val and I exchanged numbers that night and the rest is history.
How did you know he was “the one” and how long have you been married?
Val was playing hockey in Canada at the time and was only in Los Angeles for the summer. He actually flew home 2 days after we met. We had a courtship over the phone for 4 months before we ever saw each other again. I really liked talking to him, and when we saw each other for the first time since our initial meeting, I pretty much knew he was the one. Val says it’s ‘cause he needed a green card. (LOL! Ha! He jokes. He actually said that to my dad right after we got engaged. What a sense of humor.) We’ve been married for 14 years.
b.) Tell us about your children!
We have 3 children. Natasha- age 11 (12 in August), Lev- age 10 and Maksim-age 8. They are my pride and joy, although I’m not gonna lie… Some days I hide in the laundry room or my closet just to have a quite, silent place of my own! They are all extremely outgoing kids. Natasha is a total drama queen and very strong-willed, Lord help me! She’s got the bug for acting just like me and has done a few commercials. Lev is all sports, all the time, smart, diligent, sensitive and loves learning. Maks is all charisma, funny and will talk your ears off! He’s determined to be a hockey player just like his dad and is practicing and playing hard to get there.
2. In our conversations about being a single woman on the blog, many women voiced concern that it seemed that men are intimidated by successful single women. Before you were married, did you come across many men who were intimidated by your success? What was different about your husband?
I didn’t date much before I was married because I met Val when I was 18. So I don’t recall a time when I felt a man was intimidated by me. Val certainly wasn’t. But he was also equally successful in his career as I was in mine. I’m thankful we found each other so young and I didn’t have to experience that conflict. I do think it would be a difficult topic to navigate through in a budding relationship if the woman was the “bread winner” because men by nature are made to be the provider.
3. When you started having your family, were there some things you valued that you had to relinquish in order to fully engage in motherhood?
YES! Practically everything. Motherhood turned my life upside down. I absolutely loved being a mom but didn’t realize I’d have to put so many of my own desires on hold. At just 21 yrs old, I figured I’d have kids, continue to act, and be there for my husband’s career all at the same time. I figured I’d have a nanny help me with the kids (since that’s what most of Hollywood has, right?) Wrong! God closed the door on my career (for a time of about 10 years) and nudged me into a deeper, much more meaningful relationship with Him. He taught me to surrender my will to motherhood (and enjoy it) and taught me to be the kind of wife He intended for my husband.
~Are any of these more difficult than others to come to grips with?
It was hard to lay my career down in the beginning. I’d been acting since I was 5 years old. It was my life. Looking back, it was those 10 years that I grew immensely in an intimate relationship with the Lord. I can now see what He was doing in my life but it wasn’t always easy when I couldn’t see the finish line. But, there did come a time when I knew I was joyfully walking with Him – when I got offered a TV series and turned it down because my husband and I felt (with prayer) that the timing wasn’t right. That was HUGE for me. It was in that moment, I knew I was surrendered to God’s will for my life and happy about it.
4. What is the best part of motherhood for you?
Getting unexpected hugs and kisses from my kids. Seeing them laugh out loud hysterically. When my kids have had to learn a lesson the hard way, my heart melts if they later tell me they know I allowed it because I love them. And I love the homemade cards my children write for me- straight from the heart- it makes me cry.
What is the most frustrating part?
When they don’t listen! LOL- there’s always grace, but seriously, how many times am I gonna ask them to clean up their mess? Until they’re 18 I guess. 🙂
5. What projects are you working on right now in your career?
I’m filming the 2nd season of “Make It Or Break It” which airs on Tuesday nights at 9pm on ABC Family Channel. It’s a 1 hour scripted drama that follows a group of teen elite gymnasts ultimately training for the Olympics. I play Summer Van Horn- one of the gym managers- who was engaged to one of the gymnast’s dad (in the 1st season), but is now kind of dating the coach. That’s TV drama for ya! I’m playing a Christian on the show which has been an amazing opportunity to play an authentic one and not a self-righteous or hypocritical Christian you often see portrayed on TV.
Also, my production company is in development on a children’s feature film as well as several other TV projects. And I’ve written a book about health/fitness that will be released in January 2011. (Wish I could give you more details on that- but I have to wait!)
How are you balancing that with the daily demands of raising a family?
Some days are tougher than others. My husband and I do it together, that’s for sure. On days I’m working, he’s at home with the kids and vice versa. He has a lot of flexibility in his schedule which has allowed me to go back to work. I normally average 3 days a week, so I don’t feel like I’m missing out on too much with my kids. The weekends are all about them which usually means the beach, hockey games and church, of course. I’m fortunate to have family around and a few good friends that help me with the kids if Val’s schedule conflicts with mine. We’re managing well, but not without ups and downs. The most important thing for me is to keep an ongoing relationship with the Lord and not get lazy about it. And there are periods when I do. But without reading his word and being actively involved in bible study, I know life and the world would get the best of me. The renewal of my mind in His word, my focus on what’s truly important- God and eternal salvation- allows me to take a deep breath, trust in the grace He provides and not sweat the small stuff.
6. On a practical note, what does a day in your life look like and how do you manage it? Do you have help to or do you tackle most of it on your own?
I have two very different kinds of days. When I’m working on Make It Or Break It, I usually have to wake up at 3:30am to be at the studio at 5:30am. I might work a 12-14 hour day- learning lines and taping scenes which I thoroughly enjoy. When I get home, I’m always on homework duty with the kids while Val makes dinner (he’s an excellent chef). I tuck the kids into bed, back scratches included and go to sleep myself not long after. Oh yeah- did I mention doing a load of laundry in there somewhere? On days I’m not working, I’ll work out – usually a 45 minute run or 45 minutes of walking stairs, go to meetings, pay bills, do laundry, answer emails, run errands… all the stuff that needs to be done till 3pm when I pick up my kids. I take them to hockey practice, help with homework…etc. I rarely have a moment to spare. I don’t have a nanny but am SO thankful I have a cleaning lady 2x a week. Whoo Hoo!!
7. What part does your relationship with the Lord play in all of this?
Everything! I couldn’t do it without Him, nor would I ever want to try. It’s all about priorities and God needs to be at the top of the list. Otherwise, it’s all worthless. “For what shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world and lose his own soul?” Mark 8:36
8. Finally, what final words would you offer to encourage women who are in the throws of balancing their lives and are finding it a bit overwhelming?
Take a deep breath. And another. Have a good cry and ask God your big questions. He’s there for you and can handle it. Don’t be afraid to dialog with Him, out loud even. I’ve had more conversations in my car than I ever care to admit. He’s always listening to me. I don’t need an appointment and I’m not going to be put on hold. How awesome is that? I remember that God has placed me in every season of my life for a specific reason. Think about what will truly matter at the end of the day and let God take care of the rest. Don’t try to be superwoman 😉