In singleville, the summer is the time to shine! Quite literally (unfortunately) at times, as the temps soar past 100 degrees. And at other times, figuratively, as there is always a lake day around the corner or a crew going to dinner, or your teacher friends begging you to take a real lunch hour with them as they are lazing away their summer vacay. And for those in my particular crew of single girls, we have been digging into a ton of books this summer, reading and studying…setting our hearts on the Lord. In the last 2 months, I feel like we have shifted some ideologies and mindsets in such a strong way. Below I’ve written out the statements and questions that we ask ourselves on pretty much a daily basis now. And whether you are single or not, I have a feeling you might get a little something out of these little nuggets my friends have shared with me.
1. It’s not about who is going to be at the party that you can flirt with…it’s about who is at the party that you can love on.
What are your intentions in going to places? Are you going to see and be seen? Or are you going because God has led you to believe it is the best use of your time for the evening? SO many times I would go to a party because I felt like I “had to” get out of my house…I didn’t want to go, but I went simply because I “should”. And when I arrived I enjoyed folks, but not one person walked away thinking “I want to know Jesus more because Annetta loved on me well.” THAT is now my goal at a party. My time is precious. If I am going to spend it at a party, then it will be spent well for the Kingdom!
2. Whatever you are doing, have FUN.
It’s an attitude. I’ve had the worst night with the funnest people and the best night serving at an event. It’s all about perspective. If I go into it thinking, “I want to love on people and enjoy this life He has given me” I am immediately more attractive to other folks, and I actually get the opportunity to love people well! It’s a beautiful tension!
3. (a personal fav) If he’s not asking you out, he probably doesn’t like you.
So many times. Countless times. My friends and I have sat around and said, “But he SAID he liked my shoes…does that mean he is in love with me?” “No…it means he wants to marry you.” HA! It sounds ridiculous. But it is *hangs head* true. We sit and wonder what a guy’s actions or words mean. Honestly. the majority of fellas are pretty simple. If they think it, they say it. And if they like you, they will ask you out. It’s just that simple.
I can just HEAR some of you saying, “BUT what about if he doesn’t KNOW I’m interested” or “But he’s shy” or “He thinks his best friend is in love with me” or some other such craziness. My response? The same: If he likes you (eventually) he will ask you out. YOUR job is to press into Jesus. Ask Him to bring the right one at the right time.
4. Praying my heart doesn’t like “that guy”.
We all have met him…the guy that is so perfectly coiffed and gregarious. All the women just swoon when he walks in. And my heart just a-twitterpates when he looks my direction. Well…he never asked me out. And I was involved emotionally in this back and forth craziness where I would convince myself he was JUST the man for me if he would but NOTICE me. And then starts those little mental games and lies we tell ourselves, “If I was just skinnier” or “if I was prettier” or “if I was funnier” or more godly or more interesting or taller or shorter or chubbier or more talented or richer or poorer or better travelled or, or, OR…..it could go on forever!
There will always be this place where you think “I am not enough” or even “I am too much”. Or there is the even worse place (or so it seems even worse!) where we think “I am not considered…I am invisible.” LIES! LIES! LIES I tell ya! Quit believing them! And start getting on your knees….guarding your heart, asking God to keep your heart from “liking” a fella He hasn’t given you to love on! And start pressing into the Author of your story, asking HIM to move to make you the best you can be. And let me PROMISE you, my friend, THAT is enough. It is MORE than enough. Because the MORE-THAN-ENOUGH-GOD has created you to be amazing!
OK. Just wanted to throw those things out there as we go into this new month. What do you think ladies? Thoughts?!
You are FIERCELY loved this day by The One Who Knows Your Deepest Longings…
PS If you wanna set your heart on the Lord…meditate on Romans 8, Psalm 63, and Lamentations 3…you’ll get there beloved friend! He is calling you deeper and deeper and deeper!