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Need Your Insights, Sisters

Jan 23, 2011

Well, sister. Happy Monday!

I’m glad you are here AGAIN today! 

I spoke with two of you this weekend – one that I met in the play area at Chick-fil-A (love those waffle fries!) as our children played, and another at church after service on Sunday. Each of you told me that you are a regular visitor to the site and in particular, the blog! Made my day to know that someone visits us!

In all seriousness, I know that many of you join me and I’m grateful . . . BUT NOW . . . I expect to see comments from LAUREN and QUIANA – and the rest of you who just visit us (and we love that you do) but may be too shy to comment. I’m kind of wondering what ya’ll are thinking!In any case, I’ve told you that my life is consumed with the writing of “The Resolution For Women.” I’m engrossed in this book and will probably be on lockdown for the remainder of this month and the next while getting it completed. I’m grateful for your sentiments on the resolution that I brought to your attention last week. I hope that you guys were able to take away some encouragement and wisdom from all of the great comments posted.

Today, I’m eagerly seeking your thoughts on another one that I’ll be working on today and tomorrow.

This next resolution is specifically geared toward married women, and yet it will be written in a tone that will invite single women to lean in, listen and gather all the insight they can before he “puts a ring on it.”

The sentiments of this resolution are centered around a woman fulfilling her husband and honoring him. It will encourage the women who choose to make this resolution to be faithful to their husbands in their conduct AND in their conversation . . . and also to aspire to be a suitable helper for him.As I’ve thought about this today, I’ve been reminded of this verse and I’d like to get your reaction to it:

“As the ark of the covenant of the LORD was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window. And when she saw King David dancing and celebrating, she despised him in her heart. ” (1 Chronicles 15:29, NIV84)Here was David, fulfilling God’s will for his life, and instead of participating or celebrating his accomplishment, his wife despised him in her heart – which, according to the original meaning of the word, most likely also included an outward display of that feeling of discontentment. Can’t you just hear her comments to her friends about how ridiculous she thought her husband looked? Can’t you just feel the way her skin crawled when he wanted to get close to her later that evening?

Turns out – what you heart feels, your actions inevitably reveal.

And why does our heart begin to recoil against our husbands? What made Michal’s? Was it that he got to be the one bringing in the Ark instead of her? Was it that she was jealous of the attention he was receiving? What is that she felt left out of the celebration? We don’t know for sure what was happening in Michal’s heart, but you do know what’s happening in yours.So, now I turn it over to you. What I’d like to ask you may be a bit too personal for our blog. You might feel uncomfortable sharing what some of the things are that, maybe to your surprise, you’ve found yourself “despising in your heart” about your spouse. Something he’s achieving, or doing, or participating in. And maybe it’d be too much to ask you to describe how this internal grievance manifests itself outwardly in your conduct and conversations. Hmmmmm. . .I’ll let you decide what you feel comfortable sharing. But I would love to hear your response to this verse and the story behind it from your personal experience. How do you see yourself in Michal, and what are you doing to safeguard against this in your marriage? 

If you are single, have you seen any marriages where these dynamics were evident?Looking forward to your honesty and insights today. Again, thank you for joining me!


P.S. I realize that this might be a sensitive and very personal subject. So, PLEASE feel free to sign in anonymously and leave your comments without any identifying details. We can learn from each other while protecting your privacy.